Rocking my Last Baby...

Last night Neely, my 8 month old, was unusually fussy when we tried to lay her down to sleep. She's had some trouble with ear infections recently and has been rubbing her ears for several days. She's also drooling and has a runny nose. I keep thinking maybe she has another infection but no fever so without that, I hate to take her to the pediatrician and get sent home with the "it's a cold, let it run it's course"speech. It could also be teething, hence the drool  - so not sure why she's messing with her ears. Typically, she doesn't want to be rocked to sleep, she just likes to be laid in her crib and she likes to roll around and put herself to sleep, with her paci and her lullaby of course. But last night she refused to go to sleep so after about 15 minutes of crying I went in and held my big baby girl and rocked and swayed with her. I was standing up because our glider has long ago been removed from the nursery to make room for play kitchens and other toys that belong to Olivia. (WE NEED A BIGGER HOUSE - thought I'd throw that in there). Neely was very still and quiet in my arms just staring at my face. She's so heavy now and it hurt my back but I was determined to rock her until she fell asleep. She was so sweet looking up at me with her big, round eyes. She put her chubby, clammy hands on my face and played with my lips. I kissed her little baby hands and short little fingers. Just when I thought she couldn't get much sweeter she took my chin and forcefully pushed it in the other direction and then giggled very quietly...yep, she's her Mother's child; only just so sweet! I was thinking while I was rocking her that she is my last baby that I'll get to rock to sleep. After Olivia was born, I knew I wasn't finished having children. I wanted one more. It took some convincing to get my husband on board...OK A LOT of convincing but if Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy...so he gave in. I shouldn't say that because my first two made me the happiest that any Mother could be, BUT...a woman just has that feeling about having children I think, only she knows when she's done. After Neely was born, I finally had the feeling of completeness, wholeness, the feeling that I had the family I had always wanted. Instead of being somewhat envious of pregnant ladies...I felt bad for them! I felt sorry that they had to go through the trials and tribulations associated with pregnancy, birth, and the first few months of a child's life. Those first few months are rough! All worth it in the end of course, but very tough. I'm SO happy that I won't ever be pregnant again - this was the feeling I was looking for - the "DONE" feeling. So even though I was just a tiny bit sad that I was rocking my last baby to sleep last night, I was felt so fulfilled and happy. I am so lucky to have all that I have. She is my last baby but even when she's six or sixteen, she will STILL be my baby.

My husband is in Vegas but he better not STAY in Vegas

So I've always considered myself to be a strong person...well maybe not always. There were those years, close to six, that I spent in a relationship that made me feel very weak! Then one day I had one of Oprah's "Ah-Ha!" moments and realized I was too good for all that nonsense and walked out the door, never to look back. I left him, finished my under grad education, went on to obtain my Master's, had a little fun being single (ok a lot of fun), and when I was better on the inside, I met someone better. That man is the love of my life and that man is in Vegas and has left me home with our three kids four and under for four days! Thus the title of this post! The past eight months or so have probably been the most stressful time in my life. I had my third child, was promoted before I even returned from maternity leave, returned to work to take on new responsibilities, begin to supervise two people, and at year end which is an extremely busy time where I work. Then of course personally we had Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, oh it's always something! With three kids in daycare, there is always a party or event to prepare for. But I don't dare mess up any of those, I send what they need because I know how important those things are to a child. I only thought I juggled a lot before last July when baby Neely was born. So then my husband decides to go and win a trip to Vegas, how dare he? He owns a car care shop with his brother and they are both there. They won the trip from one of their suppliers. He left Thursday morning and will be back Sunday evening. It's now Saturday evening as I write. I've managed pretty well. My son, Colin, had a ball game Friday night so I lugged all three kiddos out to the ball field. Fortunate for me, three of the Grandparents showed up to help wrangle them all! I hate his Dad couldn't be there. Dad's need to be at ballgames, they just do! I know it's not always possible but it's important for a boy to look back and remember his Father being there. I know that Colin will remember it that way because his Dad is very "there". The rain squashed the game today. Of course, that only happened after I got myself and three kids dressed, packed up, and in the van, all strapped in car seats...then the email came over on my phone to cancel the game. Ah...thus is life!. Colin left late this afternoon to spend the night with my Dad so we had a quiet girls evening here at home! I complain a lot to my husband. But him being away has been a good way to remind me how much he does help, even if I feel like he doesn't all the time. When I tell him he isn't doing enough he often likes to tell me how many men don't do as much as he does. I tell him that if I had wanted a man like that, I'd have married the first one who proposed to me! There is a reason I made that life choice. Well right now tonight, I really miss him. I've really been too busy until now to miss him. Good thing he's coming home tomorrow. And on Monday, his second shop (franchise) is scheduled to open....oh bring on the stress! I think I've conditioned myself to be one of those folks that just can't stop moving...if I stop, I'll crash! I wouldn't trade my life for anything, even on the bad days!

Poop in my pants, Poop in my pants, feelin' like a fool with poop in my pants

So....the latest challenge we have faced in child rearing is a poop challenge with our four year old son. This boy has so much confidence in himself when it comes to things he feels is worthy of his time such as Godzilla, Legos, sports, etc. Why then does he insist he cant dress himself or wipe his own hind end? We have really been working with him to encourage him to dress himself (he will be five in three months mind you) as well as wipe himself. We are VERY slowly making progress. With the dressing, we have to threaten to send him to school in his night tshirt or PJs...more like a promise because we already have his preschool teacher on board and will do it if we have to. With the hind end issue, at first he would sit on the toilet and cry until we wiped him...we transitioned him into at least trying it but we had to be in the bathroom with him....now he will wipe but we have to come check him before he will pull up his pants and leave the bathroom. Now...he is pooping in his pants at school and not telling his teacher. Why? Well...in his words, "I don't like pooping at school! If I feel it coming I jump up and down to keep it from coming out. I don't want Ms Debbie to wipe me". What? You don't want your teacher to wipe you so you go in your pants and wear it! Gross...geez I don't get four year old logic! From the time he started potty training he has held it until he got home so he just likes to poop at home, like so many other people. In suppose his bowels have always cooperated with this schedule...until now!

Let Me Introduce Ourselves...

I guess I should start off my very first ever in my life post by saying that I'm not sure what I'm getting into with this blogging thing. I've heard about it, seen folks on Oprah who reached fame and fortune by doing it, but haven't ever done much blog reading myself. I've always been a writer. Even if no one ever reads my words, it's theraputic for me to put them out here...out there...wherever they go.

The title of this post is "Let Me Introduce Ourselves". I decided this blog will be about me and my family. For me, it doesn't feel that there is an "I" any longer. And like any proud parent, I want to talk endlessly about myself and my children, and my wonderful life, but who wants to actually hear that? So I type...I'm a working Mother of three and a wife so I am now "we". Maybe that's why I feel the need to have a blog, to have a way to express "myself" as an individual.

So here is what my family looks like.

Jessica (Me)
Mom, Wife, Full Time Employee, hobbies are scrapbooking, photography, cake decorating, home improvement, gardening. I work in Human Resources and love my job for the most part, since I do have to have one!

Jason
Dad, Husband, Small Business Owner, hobbies are golf, movies, fantasy sports, grilling. He ownes two Meineke Franchises and a small pressure cleaning business. He loves his job because he is his own boss.

Colin
Son, currently 4 years old, first born, only son, wild, VERY active, smart, homebody, good at just about everything he puts his mind to, Mama's boy!

Olivia
Daughter, currently 2 years old, second born, little sister and big sister, sensitive and sweet, VERY independent, determined, needs a lot of love and attention, sometimes a little shy, Mama's girl!

Neely
Daughter, currently 7 months old, third and last of the crew, baby sister, happy baby, growing too fast, also very determined, loves her big brother and sister, looks like her brother, Daddy's girl!

Lexi
Dog, West Highland White Terrior, 8 years old

Odessa
Cat, Gray with White Socks, 15 years old